Over the holidays, I watched a beautiful movie entitled, The Light Between Oceans. In the movie, one of the characters states, and I paraphrase,
“You only have to forgive once. To resent you have to do it all day, everyday. You have to think about and remember the bad things. It’s too much work.”
When I heard these lines in the movie, I was immediately struck by their efficacy, as well as the salience of them in loving ourselves unconditionally.
Holding onto grudges and grievances are often a burden too heavy to carry. In order for us to remain angry and resentful toward another, it requires our retelling an egregious story over and over to ourselves and keeping the same negative emotions gripped at our hearts, which has a far greater cost to us emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
Forgiveness, which is an act of self-love, only has to happen once. When we choose to release someone from our pain, we reclaim our personal freedom. That person no longer holds the key to our peace and happiness.
I have decided that it is far better for me to forgive someone, even in its multiple stages, than to allow someone to rob me of my joy. No one is worth holding our peace in his hands. Inner-peace is our responsibility.
If someone has hurt you, begin the process of forgiveness. Not out of love for them or condoning their behavior, but because of love and value toward yourself. It may be difficult, but take the first step. See if you can allow yourself to find compassion for someone else as you have compassion for yourself. Once we’re able to see that someone else’s hurts have caused them to hurt you, it softens the hurt and makes room for forgiveness.
Forgiveness softens and expands the heart, and through its suppleness, it makes space for greater bliss, peace, love, and abundance in our own lives.
If there’s someone you need to forgive, start the process today. If you need support, I am here to help.
With Love & Gratitude,
Photo Courtesy of Ryan Amaral, Bermuda